Everyone who knew me before is saying i'm getting fat. LOOK. I KNOW. There's nothing wrong with a few extra pounds, feeling warmer in this cold, and becoming more cuddly. And it's hard when there's good food here, either home cooking or eating out. here are the food highlights of this week:

Saturday: Called Ina, she was late for soundcheck at Esplanade. I could hear Tjinn and John in the background, banging away. on their instruments i mean. musical instruments. Sigh, i wish i were there.


Went to Watson's Bay with Adam yesterday. Ah, the joys of vehicular convenience. Very very pretty place. There's even a nude beach which too bad most of the patrons are middle aged caucasian gay men. If any of my female friends come to Sydney, must promise to go with me ok? heehee... no pics of it lah, later they not happy come and rip my ass... i scared... but check out watsons bay, sibei chio. it's dope yo. one side is beaches bay, the other side crazy suicidal cliffs...

There are seagulls everywhere. They are so not shy. One even dared to waddle up to me, tap me on my foot, and give me an expectant look before scoffing and waddling off. Bloody seagulls.

And I'd view the lush green lawns of the watsons bay sea side park with consternation if i saw a gull dropping coat on the pavements, working on a new shine for the street. Yet Aussies search for a spot without any discernible white, or at least excusable in their books, to lay down and bask in the love of their great land. Yeah, Australia is great, but bird shit is not yo.

Here's a double edged dildo. I say dildo coz the purpose the whole world seems to have on kids is masturbation of their egos. Oh He looks like you, she's got her mother's eyes. They play with it, they cuddle it, they make them an excuse for all the things they never achieved in life.

Anyway, before i digressed in my characteristic long assed compound sentences, there's kids everywhere here in the watson's bay park. Apparantly it's so prevalent that the authorities thought to erect permanent signs on the roads nearby: "Children around, drive slowly."

There's kids wading in the water, chomping on sand, rolling around in avian guano trying to get a new shine on their bodies. But the parents don't seem to care. They don't even seem to be there. I turn to see adults 30m away, sipping wine at the dock fish & chips restaurant, occasionally glancing at these kids, and i can only assume it's them. They're probably chatting to one another: "Oh look, Stella swims so well at 4! She's gonna grow up to become an Olympian!" or "Eddie has a taste for the sea, he's gonna be a marine biologist!" or "Eve is so in touch with birds and nature, and not afraid of gull feaces, i bet she's going to become a great post-modernist artist someday!"

But you see, horrific as it may sound, these kids may indeed one day grow up to become the aforementioned sources of pride, or in the case of a post-modernist artist, dubious pride. They are untethered, unafraid, and if they don't drown, get poisoned or contract fatal skin diseases, they really might become something someday.

I wouldn't know. your mind just wonders when u are sitting peacefully in a beautiful place. Singaporean kids aren't like this, though they might less likely abandon you when you're old, they probably haven't been given as much get go as these aussie kids have. And all this ruminating culminates into the whole point of my monologue so far, that is... i forgot. nevermind.



Went to Max Brenner's at Double Bay next. Damn shiok. Look at that: Vats of hot chocolate constantly stirred by the machine, piped through the ceiling straight to the barristers to dispense. oOooooo....


Adam's cats are a ball. Montgomery here is always manja and comes up to you to rub his head and demand a good stroking session. He's so friendly, it's very unlike cats. Apparantly his breed, the burmese, is known to be dog-like in this manner. If i ever get a cat, it'll be a burmese. Monty is so damn playful, energetic, and super manja. Shiok.

His other cat Sophie is more of a recluse however. hahahaha....


hahaha... yeah.

WARNING: FOOD PICS AHEAD

I find myself cooking western food alot more coz it's easy. Fresh ingrediants, chop it up, bung them into the oven, looks great, tastes good. But What i really miss are the high difficulty, gastronomical delicacies of Laksa, Curry (Singaporean way, not the sweet tame North Indian stuff here), Lontong, Mee Soto, Char Kway Teow, Fried Carrot Cake, Chee Kueh, Prata, Murtabak, Hokkien Mee, Lor Mee, Braised eggs.... and much more.

The tons of spices required and hours of careful simmering scare me. My skillz aren't there yet. I screwed up a split pea and ham fritters yesterday. Plus it sucks that my stove is one of those hazard safe heating coils, no fire at all. Naked flames produce a heat and taste unlike the stupid coil.

Anyway, I made Lasagna. Mince beef, mushrooms, garlic, mezzorella, tomatoes, herbs.... baked into quite a heavenly delight i must say. Washed down with Ceaser salad(again), Port, and some after dinner Cadbury Chocolate Brandy.



Today's Vector graphics class was quite a rush. Three pictures, three hours, trace em all and color for bonus points. 15% of final subject grade. I made sure i did something for all three, but i didn't finish a single one. And the ones that I did do, weren't really good coz i was rushing them. Walked out of the class at the end, looking for some trees in the far distance to stare at. Was kinda buzzed for the next hour, stars bursting in my eyes.

"Portions for Foxes" -Bad News by Death Cab for Cutie
Axiom of the Week: Life can be like budgeting, you can break things down to little pieces to get a better grip on them.

I've been told i'm taking my personal matters too seriously. It's unforgiving for myself. I realize i am indeed extremely unforgiving to myself. hmmm, i'll see what i can do.

In Adaptation, Charlie Kaufman asks his twin brother Donald why he never felt hurt when Donald found out his high school love was mocking him. Donald replied that his love was precious and beautiful, and not even the spurning of his love interest could take that away from him. All that mattered was that he loved.

Too bad the mofo dies.

Menage et Trois. What are you going to do without being left out? And when is it over anyway? Sorry, someone brought this up haha...

Fragmented thought, no insights of brilliant writing sorry. Hihi Cassy Wassy! haha, nice to hear from u... Jason is lonely too, maybe you should go leave him a comment and make his day too heehee.... Ina, the person who said she wanted little pieces of sliced up penis... was it Edle? I bet it's Edle! hahaha... And Micheal Jackson, I think i'm a little too old for you, and keep that "Jesus Juice" away from me, unless it's wine of course.



added at 12.27am tues:

Can't sleep coz i foolishly fell asleep at five thirty and woke up at nine thirty at night. now cannot sleep, tomolo morning got class, how?!

Was drawing some stuff last week, when a bug flew on to my eye.


When Simon saw my new sheets, my lovely green leaves and vines, he said it was a total "sheets of desire". I asked him what he meant, he said it's the kinda sheets when chicks see, they ask you if you mind them lying in it, coz it looks so inviting. Well, it'd be nicer to hear this from a lady Simon, not you hahaha. Fooled around with my camera when i was drunk yesterday haha...

It gets so lonely sometimes. I get so inspired so often here... even though it doesn't always lead to a flurry of creative output, it does usually provide a creative catharsis... a mental and emotional participation in the fascination and wonder of things that intrigue and excite.

Been watching rental dvds. It gets boring when you're not doing schoolwork and don't really have many friends and don't really know where to go and what to do. Cooking has been my escape, but it doesn't happen when you're tired or lazy.

Watched Adaptation and Lost in Translation... truly inspirational. Received the final brief for my aftereffects class. The big one. The final project. 6 weeks to work on it. I looked at the themes and a flurry of ideas came. I'm kinda lost. Ultimately there is the great desire to awe. but it's kinda jumbled up what i'm thinking of atm.

Today's Mapping the Post-Modern lecture and tutorial was about feminism and feminist artists. But this was a study of old school feminists. Today's women are either perfectly well adjusted, or abuse the idea of feminism. These abusers pull out chapters of the feminism theories whenever it's convenient, imagining injustices that just isn't there and re applying it whenever it's to their advantage. Truly, very few of my friends do that, but those who do really annoy me.

In fact, i think men have become the weaker sex. Men are subjected to resisting their biological urges in order to maintain normality in society. Men are always on the losing end in sexual persecution. It's always assumed men are the evil ones. And there comes all these rules, especially in heterosexual men, of behavior. Among the opposite gender, the same gender, and in society. I kinda envy gay men to be free from some restrictions i have, but then again, the grass might only look greener on the other side of the sexual preference, it might not be better. I understand gays and lesbians intellectually, but i have to concede i cannot totally. But who understands ME totally?

The Post-Modern art tutorial today involved two presentations, both feminist artists. One of them, Jo Spencer, documented her experience with breast cancer. From the onset, diagnosis, a series to western treatment, disappointment and turning to eastern methods, and finally leading to her death. She was not the archetypal idea of feminine beauty, but she took photos of herself battling the disease, almost always topless, her breast in various states of decline, and her face, her spirit, fighting to find her humanity and placement of body and soul.

I really admire her courage and the way she communicated her femininity. This is the kind of feminism that involuntarily draws out my respect. Not those rubbish chicks who live cushy lives and say men deserve NS, and look for rich guys, men to sponge off on, while fighting for their supposed 'rights' to avoid hard work. Probably all the girls that read my blog know a few of these psuedo-feminist chicks. Women's rights bullshitters.

When the presenter handed out more pictures of Jo Spencer's series of photos, many women winced. Btw, my class is predominantly female, out of twenty or so there are only 3 males, a 40+ yrs old post graduate, a caucasian australian and me at the early twenties. The rest of the class range from aussie women, argentinian, african american, singaporean (NUS theater grad, bah! haha), hong kong etc.

The women in the class winced when they saw the ordeals Jo Spencer had to go through. Countless mammograms, breast exams, markings made on her breasts, the eventual mastectomy, her questioning of her womanhood. My classmates winced. As if they could feel her pain. I saw their expressions and found it amusing. Wow, women can do that, i thought only men did.

Like how Eddie Murphy put it in his stand up comedy Raw 2. Don't violate the penis. Men are sensitive to the penis. You so much as show a man getting kicked in the balls in the movies, and all the men in the audience will wince and say "oooohh... that gotta hurt..." Coz they can feel the pain. They can relate to that. That's why it's a sensitive topic. The most terrifying and horrific thing you could say to a guy is probably "i'm gonna cut off your penis!" and if you do it convingcingly enough, he'll wince and be scared (or put on a serious tone and say "DONT YOU EVER JOKE ABT THAT AGAIN.")

And here i was, a gender minority, in an art history class, sympathetic to Jo Spence the artist, but finding the women wincing at her pictures, something hard to relate to, something i'll probably never be part of. But i thought of Eddie Murphy and if the photos were of a man having prostrate cancer, undergoing countless tests, questioning his manhood, eventually undergoing vasectomy or even castration, and still leading to his death... and then i understood my classmates.

Perhaps our genders aren't so different after all, we're all of the same species.



Feeling very shitty atm. tried to put down some revelations wittily, but i still feel so lonely. so alone.


anyway, check out
http://www.youtube.com/?v=9NkB_3v8RJg
and
http://www.youtube.com/?v=fF3owxm8yAY
vids i took of the band performing at the cofa spring fiar. very funny! hahaha

WARNING! Image intensive post! Abt 1mb of pictures loading in this npost alone! not including my old posts. DON'T WORRY, NO FOOD PICS.

Tried to post this last night but my internet connectionw as acting Willy Wonky again. Was so stoked yesterday, i went to the College of Fine Arts Spring Fair 2005! Seminars, exhibitions, workshops, markets, music, films! Happening!

First thing you get when u go in is the super happening flea market! Art supplies, artwork, hand made jewellery, hand screened shirts, zines, badges, even muffins! Check it out:


Next, i went to the studio exhibitions. Krissy and Serene, i am so sure this'll make you yearn so much to be here. I visited the painting, drawing and sculpture studios, and there were works in progress, and beautiful painting everywhere! Just look at the place, paint and brushes everywhere, and when you're there, there's the smell. the smell of paint. the smell of creative forces drawing your soul onto your surface of expression. damn shiok man.

There were workshops too, for kids and adults, from the studio ones like painting life drawing sculpture workshops, to the lectures on advance photoshop etc, and seminars (one of them was abt the formula for creative intergrity and commercial success).


Then there were indie and award winning film screenings. See the room with all the lovely couches and armchairs? That's one of the screening rooms, it's our student common lounge where we go to chill and play pool in between classes. And there were gigs too, this band Pomo Mofo damn happening, dancing around like fools with catchy dance rock tunes. Hip hop freestylers, even jazz bands, and even a string quartet feature below!


I spent abt 55 bucks, of which 45 bucks went into my teo t shirts. i love the little earthworm on the back of my white tee. Eightball Badge! Tara got me the first issue of street art zine over a year ago from here by post. It's since out of print, i'm lucky to have one, and to complete my series i got issues 2 3 and 4.


it was damn happening! Exciting, fun, creative, sigh. So inspirational and refreshing. Don't you want to be here too?

Hello everyone. Welcome to Sidney's Culinary Delights. Today, we will learn how delicious my Creamy Potato Bake is. Here's are the ingrediants:

Potatoes
Turkey Ham
Onion
Garlic
Baby Eggplant
Cherry Tomatoes
half cup milk
black pepper
Can of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom and Chicken soup (yeah i cheated, but it still rocks)
Italian Herbs (Marjoram, Basil, Red bell Peppers, Rosemary, Oregano, Parsley and Thyme)
Grated Parmesan

First, microwave potatoes for 10min or till tender. During this time, stir fry the Turkey Ham, Garlic, Baby Eggplant, and Onion. Make sure Onions turn transparent, and have some pieces golden brown for that sweet aroma. Mix the condensed soup with the milk and black pepper to taste.



Once potatoes are done, pour the stir fry dish among the potatoes. Even them out, and dot them here and there with your cherry tomatoes. Then pour the soup and milk mixture over everything, allowing the goodness to seep in between the botatoes. Sprinkle lavishly with the Italian Herb and Grated Parmesan. Put into oven preheated at 220 deg cel for 25-35min, depending on how crisp you want the crust to be or creamier undercrust. Serve with Tabasco for the Spicy-food lovers.



Enjoy.

cooking is kind of an escape for me... you imagine what you wanna do, you think of what u need, you go out and get it. while buying stuff, other stuff catch ur eye. you expand on ur original recipe. you go home, judge the portions, pack the rest, i cut very delicately and slowly, so i cut for damn long. sometimes up to an hr of slicing.
?
then you cook, and watch the food 'ripen' as they call it in chinese. it metamorphosizes. It changes from inedible into edible. It's like magic!
?
but the best part is when people eat it. i might not try so hard if i knew i was the only one eating. My housemate was pretty pleased with the Creamy Potato bake hehehe. Much of the pleasure comes from seeing other enjoy your cooking. It wonderful, you feel pride, pleasure, love at the same time. There physical(gastronomical) satisfaction, as well as sating emotional and mental needs. Just so nice.

And the whole process always comes to fruition. unlike some endeavors of life. this is so sure-fire (no pun intended).

I'm probably gonna go back to Singapore fatter than i left, but if it means i'll be a happier person, and my research shows most worthwhile girls don't care as long as the guy is great, i'll be somewhat chubbier in December.
?

I'm actually feeling kinda sad atm, but i planned out a nice and cheerful entry so i'm not gonna let meself down on this atm. so here goes:

Saturday:
I couldn't finish my work in school on friday night, after a whole week of working till 9pm everynight in the school lab. Don't have illustrator at home, so no choice. So sad had to burn Saturday to come to school to do. Sigh. Nevertheless, i woke up, determined not to let this ruin my day, and proceeded to make a wicked breakfast. I surprised my just woken up housemate to the smell of Mushroom Omelette, Rashers of Bacon, Sausages, and other goodies. He can be seen enjoying himself below hehe. I made a sandwich for lunch in school and ate another oprtion for breakfast. Finished all the work for Monday submission today.


Sunday:
Invited Beatrice and Simon over to cook for them. Had alot of fun, very grateful Simon washed the dishes for me. I didn't have enough plates in the house for guests, so Ian and I ate out of boxes. It was lovely, the first time i had friends over. Very homely feeling, it felt wonderful. All the food was ok, but i screwed up on the hard boiled eggs... of all things, i messed up an easy one. It came out soft-boiled and didn't harden no matter how much further i cooked it. Wierd. Watched Charlie and the Chorcolate factory after that with Bibi and Ian. Damn funny. It was fantastic. Violet Beauragard is hot! Her mum is an alien! (she was anyway in Lost in Space, and Third rock from the Sun and various Star Trek shows). Mr Depp once again is impeccable, a performance comparable to Jack Sparrow, wonky enough for wonka. Oompa Loompas damn cute, Danny Elfman's lovely music once again. Can't help but to love Burton huh... he made his wife Helena Bonham Carter have ugly teeth in his show!


Monday:
Vector Graphics in Visual Arts, class at 9am. Submission followed by presentation. Made a few Jaws drop and others not dare to present, but that's not something i'm proud of. Some ppl's work were crazy amazing. Abt 2 ppl lah. The rest all cmi. So here's a little mishmash of what i was busting my ass on last week. Brief was to submit 5 vector traces, a logo, architecture, an animal, a product, and a person. No color, stroke width of 0.25 to 0.4. Seperate A3 printouts. It might not be that good, but i'm proud of it coz i really fucking bust my ass on it. dammit man. That was one week of hell.

Just spent 6 hrs creating one graphic. The vector traces of the product, logo and building weren't so tough. This one really killed me. I'm so glad it's done, so here it is, my little fishies!


I made the Wickedest Sandwich today and took it to school. I made the Wickedest Fried Rice a few days back, but i didn't get to take the photo coz i ate it up first hehehe. It had Bacon, Chicken Sausage, Cabbage, Broccolli, Red and Green Capsicum, Italian Mushrooms, Garlic, and seasoned with fermented tofu in chilli and sesame oil. It was delectable!


Current book: The Book of the Penis by Maggie Paley. "The Penis (dick, schlong, pecker, rod, tool, johnson etc) is the object of great adoration, revulsion, ridicule, amazement, pride and even frustration. But does anyone fully understand the penis? From ancient Greece to contemporary Internet, Meggia Paly submerged herself in the obsessive world of this most forthright of organs, interviewing sex workers, transsexuals, and phallus connoisseurs of all stripes. This delightfully illustrated bedside companion, erupting with facts, fallacies and fantasies, is certain to develop classic stature."