i am going paranoid. i may be wrong, because as the very intelligent poster of the movie "Enemy of the State" tells me, it's not paranoia if they are really after you.

i tried reaching out, but time after time get ignored, gone against, and hurt. time after time i am excluded, untold, kept from.

why should this matter? but then again, why should they enjoy it, because i sure can't, and it's a bitter feeling not to have something everyone else is enjoying. but then again, it's not the enjoyment itself. sheesh.

my nightmares must stop